MARRIAGE ...Aspects & PROBLEMS.!

[sivank]

The whole concept of ARRANGED MARRIAGE is weird.

Yes it works for most because of coercion and pressure.

It works out for some cause they are lucky.

Love marriages also dont work out at times. Even otherwise, its always better to try KNOWN devils than UNKNOWN ones.

I aint saying, ELOPE with the person you want, WITHOUT PARENT'S CONSENT. that is a GRAVE MISTAKE. IRREPAIRABLE.

Get the consent of ur parents, (which is no.one) then get married.
IF they dont, try and convince, IF THEY STILL DONT AGREE.....

CHOOSE another (OF UR OWN WILL, NOT PARENT'S ARRANGED ALLAINCE) which ur parents approve of.

If you love somebody deeply you have to stand for them. Sometime parents do it for the sake of their own prestige: I call it as selfish.

[Wibha]

Parents if they really love their children,

SHOULD support whatever happens due to any marriage (love or arranged)

JUST BECAUSE U DONT LISTEN to them, and get into love marriage, THEY WOULD WASH HANDS OFF YOU?? (assume the extreme case of marrying without consent)

if any parent, FIND THIS OPPORTUNITY TO PICK upon their kids, and wound them for wrong choice, IN MY OPINION, they have MORE EGO, than love for their own children.

should only parents support us forever no matter what we do.....we get pissed off if someone does something we dont like.why cant we expect the same.......why can't we support them.they sacrifice their whole life for us.what do we give in return to them.......atleast we can marry someone they want us to and then make our lives happy and also see their happiness.....even when you love you love a stranger.you don't love someone you know........... you love and then marry......instead in arranged marriages you can marry and then fall in love..........

[thamizhvaanan]

Why everyone is cursing arranged marriages... there are certain ppl like me who count on arranged marriages to get a decent wife

If I do go out, looking for a female... the process of natural selection rears its ugly head and spoils everything

[crazy]

never ending argument

I am ok with all the three options but i feel, love marriage with the consent of parents is the best :P

I wonder how Valluvan got married Vasugi, was that love or arranged marriage

[Shakthiprabha.]

should only parents support us forever no matter what we do.....

I aint saying, THEY NEED TO SUPPORT BLINDLY AND SHAKE THEIR HEADS for every decision of ours. They HAVE A SAY.
Even, If they dont like it, for any silly reasons like EGO OR PRESTIGE, THEY ARE OBLIGED AND SHOULD BEND for us out of LOVE.

we get pissed off if someone does something we dont like.why cant we expect the same

Yes, as a young girl, you are bound to get pissed off faster and carry it for longer time. AS PEOPLE who are MORE MATURED, they should learn to FORGIVE and LEARN TO look from their chilndren's point of view too.

.......why can't we support them.they sacrifice their whole life for us.what do we give in return to them.......

what do u think you should give?

the decision for them to CHOOSE whom u marry ALL BY THEMSELVES?

DO U give up UR CAREER OR STUDYING OPTION for their sake?
Say u are good in science, ur prents wants u to become a chartered accountant, DO U GIVE UP UR NATURAL INTEREST AND GO IN FOR ACCOUNTANCY?

If such is THE freedom GIVEN for trivial (relatively) m atters like UR CAREER, how much of importance should be given to UR LIFE?

SHOULD IT NOT BE A joint decision?
A DECISION WHERE U CHOOSE whom u marry, and THEY APPROVE OF IT, IF FOUND RIGHT.

atleast we can marry someone they want us to

WHO is gonna live together? Are parents gonna live with their children's spouse? or

are YOU gonna tackle day to day problems wiht ur spouse?
Its GONNA BE A LIFE LONG DECISION, most of us dont call off marriage for small reasons, SO A LIFE LONG COMMITMENT!! where UR LIFE and UR CHOICE IS 900% ESSENTIAL

and then make our lives happy and also see their happiness.....

Its our duty to keep them happy, see that they are NOT OFFENDED by our choice.

but....

happiness in MARRIAGE SHOULD NOT BE WORKED OUT.

it should BLOOM NATURALLY!

even when you love you love a stranger.you don't love someone you know...........

When u fall in love, YOU DONT SEE, HOW MUCH THEY EARN, WHICH CASTE they belong to, HOW IS THEIR FAMILY etc?

YOU fall in love for other reasons (lets leave love which happens primarily for looks)

you love and then marry......instead in arranged marriages you can marry and then fall in love......

oh dont count on it!!

There are marriages, (lots of them I should say) atleast in older generation, where THEY STAYED TOGETHER, because of society.

ELEMENT OF LOVE? where is it?

[Shakthiprabha.]

The whole concept of ARRANGED MARRIAGE is weird.

Yes it works for most because of coercion and pressure.

It works out for some cause they are lucky.

Love marriages also dont work out at times. Even otherwise, its always better to try KNOWN devils than UNKNOWN ones.

I aint saying, ELOPE with the person you want, WITHOUT PARENT'S CONSENT. that is a GRAVE MISTAKE. IRREPAIRABLE.

Get the consent of ur parents, (which is no.one) then get married.
IF they dont, try and convince, IF THEY STILL DONT AGREE.....

CHOOSE another (OF UR OWN WILL, NOT PARENT'S ARRANGED ALLAINCE) which ur parents approve of.

If you love somebody deeply you have to stand for them. Sometime parents do it for the sake of their own prestige: I call it as selfish.

Well 99 percent WE do stand for them.
Yes, some parents do it for prestige and are selfish for society's cause. If parents REFUSE to go in,

sivan, my view is, BEND FOR UR FAMILY.

Every love NEED NOT END in marriage. Every love which does not end in marriage IS NOT A FAILURE.
It has been given up for LOFTIER PURPOSES.

If u are not able to forget ur love, REMAIN un married.

I DO NOT EVER WANT SUBSCRIBE TO MARRIAGE WITHOUT APPROVAL OF PARENTS.

They raised us, THEY LOVE US, THEY CARE FOR US.
THERE CAN NEVER BE a peaceful life, without their HAPPINESS AND BLESSINGS.

[crazy]

If u are not able to forget ur love, REMAIN un married.

[Shakthiprabha.]

and yes..

THE MOST SADDEST and WRONG thing one can do is...

GIVING UP LIFE OR committing suicide FOR LOVE! .. AND claiming... ITS DIVINE love!!

DIVINITY never say COMMIT SUICIDE.

I CONDEMN all such movies, which PUT IN SUCH ideas THRO THEIR super duper hits

[sivank]

Hi SP,

Great writing

[Shakthiprabha.]

thx. Just was jut a normal post, dont elevate it to WRITING