MARRIAGE ...Aspects & PROBLEMS.!

[Sudhaama]

.
Dear Friends,

POLL - OPTIONS Description :--

(1) LOVE MARRIAGE ignoring the Parents :-- Choice and Decision by the Lovers independantly... irrespective of both sides Parrents' Wishes - Even if unconsented by the Parents, IGNORING their advice and Objections... getting Married by Lovers' exclusive decision only.

(2) LOVE MARRIAGE with the consent of Parents :-- After taking initial decision independantly by the lovers, getting the Consent of both sides Parents by any means of Persuasion, and then getting Married.

(3) ARRANGED MARRIAGE by the Loving Parents :-- This does not mean the Age-old method of joint-decision by both sides Parents only.. at the tender age of the Couple before adolescence... and getting them Married by means of exclusive decision by the Parents.

But the Spadework is performed by the Loving Parrents. Various options of the proposals are searched for by them.. who function as the Secretaries for the couple, and on the youngsters behalf... selection is made by the Couple on the recommendation and advice of the Parents...

Finally decided jointly by the Parents and the Couple.

Here the persuasion is from the Parents to their Son/ Daughter... whose concurrence is the most important...

...although unanimously decided by the Parents and the Couple.

In our present days.. which is the Best?...Arranged or Love Marriage?... Why?

By Your experience...SEEN AND HEARD... how many Love-Marriages are Successful.. and

....How many NOT?...Why.?... What were the PRACTICAL problems.. comparatively?

How many Arranged Marriages had failed... or had lot more problems.?.. What sort of problems?

What is Your Advice to the present day Youngsters on the matter?

Shall we discuss?
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[Wibha]

nice thread

[Shakthiprabha.]

The whole concept of ARRANGED MARRIAGE is weird.

Yes it works for most because of coercion and pressure.

It works out for some cause they are lucky.

Love marriages also dont work out at times. Even otherwise, its always better to try KNOWN devils than UNKNOWN ones.

I aint saying, ELOPE with the person you want, WITHOUT PARENT'S CONSENT. that is a GRAVE MISTAKE. IRREPAIRABLE.

Get the consent of ur parents, (which is no.one) then get married.
IF they dont, try and convince, IF THEY STILL DONT AGREE.....

CHOOSE another (OF UR OWN WILL, NOT PARENT'S ARRANGED ALLAINCE) which ur parents approve of.

[Wibha]

arranged marriages and love marriages have their own pros and cons... but loving and eloping for the other person is foolishness.....the marriages which always work are arranged marriages......it's chosen by parents who can never think bad for their children..........and so whomever they choose will actually be fit for the person....... ARRANGED MARRIAGES are always the best......

or like SP akka says choose someone whom u like and parents will agree

arranged marriages can never get oudated.no matter what

[littlemaster1982]

Good intentions don't guarantee good results always.

How you will decide about a person whether he/she is suitable for you over a cup of coffee?.

How many parents ask their children about their preferences when they look for a match?

I feel it silly rather than wierd.

[Wibha]

if the person parents choose is wrong there's always a solution and moral support.......u fall in love and know it's a wrong person......is there a bigger heartbreak than this? and nowadays parents do ask if the person likes the match..it makes sense

[Shakthiprabha.]

Parents if they really love their children,

SHOULD support whatever happens due to any marriage (love or arranged)

JUST BECAUSE U DONT LISTEN to them, and get into love marriage, THEY WOULD WASH HANDS OFF YOU?? (assume the extreme case of marrying without consent)

if any parent, FIND THIS OPPORTUNITY TO PICK upon their kids, and wound them for wrong choice, IN MY OPINION, they have MORE EGO, than love for their own children.

[littlemaster1982]

There's always a solution?!!! Only you will get loads of advice with the conclusion "Kalyanaathula ithellaam sagajam. neethan adjust pannikkanum".

Falling in love and later knowing your selection is wrong? That means you have not understood your partner properly. That's all I can say

I don't know how I can like or dislike a person without knowing even a little bit.

[MuratuKaalai]

These days Marriages should be made with the following pre-requisites:

1. HIV negative certification

2. No midnight partying habits

3. No 2/3/4th husband or wife [ illegal affairs]


have an option as "Physically and Morally Healthy Marriage With Consent of Everyone!"

That would be apt in today's scenario
Udamba Paathukonga Makkale
Kaalam ketu pochu ... mulichiko usaara irundhuko

[Wibha]

These days Marriages should be made with the following pre-requisites:

1. HIV negative certification

2. No midnight partying habits

3. No 2/3/4th husband or wife [ illegal affairs]


have an option as "Physically and Morally Healthy Marriage With Consent of Everyone!"

That would be apt in today's scenario
Udamba Paathukonga Makkale
Kaalam ketu pochu ... mulichiko usaara irundhuko