A joke per day...keeps the doctor away!

[NOV]

Q: Is google a boy or girl?

A: Obviously a girl because it wont let you finish your sentence without suggesting other ideas

[NOV]

Boy: Hi.

Girl: I have a boyfriend.

Boy: I said hi, not give me a kiss.

[NOV]

I was in in the public restroom
I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice in the other stall:
"Hi, how are you?"
Me: (embarrassed) "Doin' fine!"
Stall: "So what are you up to?"
Me: "Uhhh, I'm like you, just sitting here."
Stall: "Can I come over?"
Me: (attitude) "No, I'm a little busy right now!!"
Stall: "Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!

[NOV]

Police: where do you live?
Boy: with my parents
Police: where do your parents live?
Boy: with me
Police: where do you all live?
Boy: together
Police: where is your house?
Boy: next to my neighbors house
Police: where is your neighbors house?
Boy: if I tell you you wont believe me.
Police: tell me
Boy: next to my house

[NOV]

The phone bill was exceptionally high. Man called a family meeting to discuss.

Dad: This is unacceptable. I don't use home phone, I use my work phone.

Mum: Me too. I hardly use home phone. I use my companies phone

Son: I use my office mobile, I never use the home phone.

All of them shocked and together look at the maid who's patiently listening to them.

Maid: "What? So we all use our work phone. What's the Big deal??!"

[NOV]

[NOV]

[NOV]

My wife hasn't stopped looking through the window since it started raining.

If it gets any worse, I might have to let her back in.

[NOV]

I told my dad to embrace his mistakes.

He cried.

Then he hugged my sister & me.

[NOV]

Did you hear about the guy who was brought in to the hospital, badly beaten up?

It was his birthday, and his wife had bought him an iPhone 5.

Apparently he had told his wife that he was happy because the phone had panorama view and he could finally take her picture....